Expert Says Algebra is Made Up and its Only Purpose is to Re-Introduce the Alphabet to Dumb Teenagers

I remember that first math class where they started introducing letters into the equations. It was a real mind fuck. But it turns out it was all a sham. An expert claims the sole purpose of algebra is to re-introduce the alphabet to dumb teenagers that forgot it.

Yeah, that’s right. Learning the Pythagorean Theorem (a² + b² = c²) was all for nothing. Your teacher was simply trying to re-enforce your knowledge of the ABC’s. I wish they would have just played that old Jackson 5 song on repeat instead.

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It’s a tried-and-true method of getting these kids to remember all 26 letters of the alphabet. We just sneak those letters into other areas of study and they may be a little confused at first, but soon enough they can recite their ABC’s no problem. Algebra seems to be the only way to do this successfully. – Letter Expert Jean Wagner

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So kids, next time you’re looking at a complex math equation, just remember that it doesn’t actually mean anything. Simply write out as many letters as you can remember for your answer. Hell, if you can write the entire alphabet, even better. Your teacher will be elated and you’ll be on your way to an A+.

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