Governors are considering requiring special suits to be worn to combat COVID-19

For the last several months, governors and other states officials have been trying to find the best ways to flatten the curve of COVID-19 cases. Finally, they believe they found the solution:

The new COVID-19 suit (also known as a gimp suit) that many state officials believe will drastically cut down on new cases

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Now to address the elephant in the room: this is definitely just a gimp suit. One anonymous governor tried to clear up any confusion on the new dress code guidelines:

“We know many people may be confused that we’re asking citizens to wear gimp suits. But what we have found is that the BDSM community has a much lower rate of new COVID-19 cases across the board. We believe this is a result of wearing these suits. It only makes sense that we recommend wearing these to the general public.” -anonymous Governor

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He then went on to say these suits could be a perfect Halloween costume:

“Why not kill two birds with one stone!? Stay safe out there, folks.”

*Woken News is a satirical news website and our articles are strictly for entertainment purposes. Explore our “About” page for more information.

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